Our Journey Raising Two Children with Special Needs

This blog chronicles our life raising two children, Nicholas 15, diagnosed with Prader-Willi Syndrome and Weston 18, diagnosed with Autism/Asperger's/ADHD. It's the ups, the downs, the joys, the sorrows and most importantly, the beauty of living a life less perfect, a life more meaningful.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

The Swear Word Sheriff of the House

My son, Weston is in the 7th grade.

True to the spirit of a pre-teen boy, he now embraces the "cool" culture of middle school kids.

He wears low rider jeans.
He yearns for ipods and cell phones.
He notices pretty girls.

But there is one middle school activity, that my son, Weston does not care to engage in......no matter how cool it is!

He absolutely, positively WILL NOT.....................swear!


In fact, it upsets him to hear others use foul language of any kind. If someone is swearing, he will flee from the room covering his ears as if the words were somehow made of airborne acid.

Now, I would like to say that his disdain for inappropriate words is due to my fine example of parenting perfection, but I would be lying....bigtime...as this is simply NOT the case. I must admit from time to time, I will often utter an expletive or two, usually under my breath.

My husband, Pete is also not exactly a perfect role model of a speaker. Being a onetime marine serviceman, he is very comfortable, perhaps a little too comfortable using the old "barracks" lingo.

But rest assured, if any of us indulge in foul language of any kind, Weston,the profanity policeman is there to accost us.

"Mommmm," he'll say, rather annoyed, "You're doing it again."

And suddenly, I'll realize that I have subconsciously let another "zinger" slide.

Even mild-mannered Nicholas, picked up on this terrible habit, when one day, he told his father he wasn't going to take any more of his "shit".

I have found that swearing is alot like yawning, it's catchy. When I am around a person who swears, it isn't long before I am doing it too. But since Weston has become so sensitive to its ill effects, all of us have made an effort to curb our use of swear words.

At first, it was difficult for us to stop using this type of language.  But we soon learned to control our tongues or face the "Wrath of Weston". Make no mistake about it, Weston has become the self imposed, swear word sheriff of the house.  He is quick to identify the latest offender who has made the serious mistake of using an outlawed word.

This language cleansing was particularly tough for Pete, who works daily alongside fellow tradesmen who pride themselves on their use of colorful metaphors.

"Daaaadddd!" Weston will shout, when a foul word happens to slip.

"Sorry Weston," his Dad will reply as we all are learning to clean up our acts.

"Why do so many people swear?" Weston will ask me.

"I don't know,"  I answer, "Maybe it's because, they think it's cool, or they think it makes them sound tough, or they don't even realize they're doing it."

"That doesn't make any sense," Weston says "swearing just makes people sound dumb."

"You're right," I say and pray that he keeps up with his penchant for profanity-free parley.....for all of our sakes.


inca said...

Hi Lisa , your post made me laugh so much Max sounds very much like Weston in his thoughts about it!Max never lies,and always follows rules to the exact word!My friend who is a carer swears like a trooper and it is catching I end up using swear words in my sentences!Ha!Max wrote a letter to Father Christmas asking for a i pod nano luckily I could make out I pod as he is dyslexic the rest I found difficult to read but all he said "mom santa can read anything" ;) I have just signed up to do a course on p.w and my dream would be to come to America one day with our little respite boy,we love him for wh he is but sadly the same isn't felt at home:( Bless you all becky xx

Lisa said...

Thank you Becky for all your kind comments.

You are a wonderful mother and a kind and compassionate carer to a very fortunate child diagnosed with PWS. He is lucky to have you in his life. Thank you for taking on this challenge. You will be rewarded in ways you will never imagine. It is the toughest, most difficult, most wonderful and fulfilling experience you will ever have. Please know that we are here for you if ever you have any questions or concerns.

Like you, I struggle sometimes to understand others and the decisions they make regarding the care of their children. What I have realized, over time, is that all I can do is continue to love my child unconditionally and advocate for other children simply by writing about our experiences. I hope that my words may help to educate others to the true beauty that lies beneath any child's diagnosis.

You have much love in your heart. Please start writing. I am sure there is much you can teach us. I would love to read your blog! Let us know when it is up and running!

Best wishes and prayers to you and your family.

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